Finally! March is here! I’ve pressed toward publishing a novel since I first heard a story. Launching Refuge on March 25 is a pinnacle.
About one in a thousand writers find a publisher. God has brought to fruition something rare. He helped me endure setbacks and carried me through many temptations to give up. In God’s timing, he opened the door. That he would use me to tell a redemption story floors me. I am overwhelmed with gratitude.
But this isn’t my most important job. My primary job shaped me for this.
As a bumbling, confused, and undeserving teenager, God gave me the most significant responsibility of my life. I became a mother two months after I turned eighteen. I was immature. I didn’t even know who I was. But God’s ways are not our ways. He blesses us even when we don’t deserve it. He knows we have no hope apart from him, so he draws us to himself.
In my life he used precious flesh-and-blood blessing. He used love.
From the moment of my first child’s conception, the Lord began to transform me. He gave me a fierce protective love to guard my firstborn’s life. Almost everyone thought I should abort him. I never even considered it.
God took that stumbling start and all my many mother errors, and he loved me through it all. Every day he continues to open my eyes to see myself clearly. He enables me to repent and to grow. He remakes me. It takes time. He is patient. His most powerful tools are our six children. Loving people so much you’d gladly lay down your life for them transforms a woman. It makes her more selfless. It changes her focus to others.
My children have watched my transformation. I have grown. They know I am still growing and have a lot more growth to go. God’s Word shapes and guides me. His Word makes me alive. Christ has used his words to create a new woman, a woman still in the process of metamorphosis. They are witnesses.
Paul told Timothy that learning the Scriptures early and watching the changed lives of his mother and grandmother showed him that the Scriptures were “able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 3:15b). Timothy knew, because he had seen it. I hope my own children know too, having watched God’s Word bring growth in me.
God has done it. There’s no ability within me. They know that for a fact.
Modeling this through my failures and my continual repentance before their watching eyes has been my most important job. My mothering responsibility will never be topped, no matter how many books I write or blogs I post. God has used motherhood to shape me for life and for my writing ministry.
I write for people like me. I write to tell them there is hope. If God can transform a broken girl like me, he can transform you. If God can love someone like me, he certainly loves you. This is why I write.
So read Refuge. It is a story for broken people.
Is God there when you’ve ruined everything? Does he care when you’ve committed what seems to be the unforgivable sin? Yes. His arms are open. Walk toward Jesus. He will redeem and he will heal. There is hope.
See my story: HERE
Middle photo by Salomon Ligthelm. Used by permission.