The manuscript is ready. I’m sending it in today. The final edit is complete. Off it goes to my editor at Koehler Books. He will now take a whack at it. With sadness, I leave the imaginary world I’ve immersed myself in for the past six weeks. I will miss my characters. I love them. Finishing the edit is like reading the final page of a novel I love.
Imagine you’re reading the best book you’ve ever read. It’s one of those you can’t put down. You try to devour it in a day, two at most; but if interruptions and life intervene, you carry the characters around in your head, wondering what will happen next, eager to return to their company. Not only are you immersed in their world, but you’re carrying the story line and all the details around in your head. That’s what it feels like to be a fiction writer. It is bliss. The best!
There’s a big difference between editing a manuscript you’re trying to sell and editing one you have already sold. Now it is reality. Finally, I could clear my schedule as much as possible and disappear into my tale, cavort with my characters, feel their pain, and cry their tears. Not to do so would be irresponsible. I had a deadline. And so, I hunkered down. It was now permitted.
After squeezing the work on this novel into the nooks and crannies for four years, it was a blessing to clear the decks and make this the main task. To have societal permission to do so. To not have the niggling worry that I was shirking responsibility by spending time on creative work. Having a contract granted permission. Without it, the challenge was growing.
Why do we place this guilt on ourselves for using the creative gifts God has given us?
Before the contract, it was becoming difficult to keep moving forward, to keep believing I had permission to use my God-given gifts and to continue to refine and strengthen them. I wrote this novel four years ago. I’ve written four others since. Could I keep writing fiction if I hadn’t sold any yet? Last spring I read a book that kept me going: Creating Space by Ed Cyzewski.
Creativity and inspiration are intangible and spiritual. Our God is creative; he is the Creator, and we are made in his image. While we’re using our creative gifts, we feel more attuned to God. We feel him open our minds, move our hearts, and inspire our ideas. Brains don’t turn off by the clock. Ideas can wake us at 3 a.m. Creativity can be unmanageable.
I love this. I feel God’s heartbeat when I write. I love putting his truth into story form.
And now, the deadline is here. Today it goes to the publisher. It’s back to reality. It’s like leaving a fairy land. I am sad. I’m glad there will be more editing after my editor combs through it. But for now I’m happy to turn to the other writing that has piled up behind this project.
What happens next? We’ll see. This is a novel journey. We’re in unexplored territory.
Has freedom to use your creativity been a challenge for you?
Bottom three Images: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
I loved the paragraph about carrying the characters around in your mind when you are reading a novel. That is where I am now, reading your novel for the second time and loving it just as much the second time, even though I know what’s coming for the most part! It’s a very special, exciting and moving novel. Those who have not read it will find your talent and ability amazing and praise God for this work! Those of us who have already read it are already doing so! Fly away Refuge. Go out into the world to spread the Good News of the character and love of our God!!
Thanks, Mom. I’m not sure how much weight glowing reviews by mothers hold, but it would be nice if they counted for much!
I just read Chapter 3 of “God-Sized Dreams” by Holley Gerth and she addresses this idea of giving ourselves permission to be doing the thing God has called us to and not measuring our worth by the tangible that everyone else may be living in. We have worth in Christ and if He is leading us to do that thing, then be obedient to it – He sees us, made us for this vision He has given. It gives me permission to say no to other things – good things – that scream they are more important. If that means planting plants, sewing a doll, studying His Word for a discipleship time or Bible study yet to be shared, stop and say hello to a neighbor while out in the yard, etc., then I have His permission to do it. I do not need everyone else’s. Another one of her thoughts was that it is not less spiritual to enjoy the thing God has called us to do – I can stop feeling guilty and believing Satan and other’s lies that what I am doing can’t be of God or for God because I am enjoying every minute of it. We enjoy it because He wired us to enjoy it and gave us experiences and education opportunities, strengths and skills to be used right where he desires to use us. This is an amazing thing for me – me who is duty driven, but wants to be joy driven. Jesus’s food was to do His Father’s will – and He says in Hebrews 12 that “for the joy set before Him, He endured the cross and sat down at the right hand of the Father.” For the joy of doing His Father’s will. I want that…
I feel like a salmon swimming up stream much of the time. Like the salmon, I’m doing what God designed me to do. I’m doing what he equipped and urged me to do. I’m doing what makes me ecstatically happy and what glorifies him. But like the salmon, it’s a mighty struggle swimming against the flow.
Melinda – first of all, congratulations for finishing the race!! How wonderful!!
Creativity is a God-given gift…and we need to take time for it each day. Thank you for this post!!
Thank you, Kim! Using our gifts for Christ’s service is a blessing. I’m glad I can serve him. I know you are, too!
This is my first visit to your blog, Melinda, and I love your writing style and sense of humour. I especially liked your finger-pointing, chastising photo. It made me smile. I’m adding your blog to my feed and will be interested in knowing more about your book as it makes its way to publication.
Thank you, Debbie! I appreciate your kind words and the little chat we had on Google+. God bless you!
Congrats, friend!
Thank you very much, dear friend. God bless you as you pursue your passion for literature and for teaching it.